Hunting for Friends

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There are two types of friendships—friends who are planted into your life and friends you have to hunt for.


Planted friends are the ones whom God graciously buries into your life without your consent. These are the friendships that bloom effortlessly; the ones that seem to fall from the sky and develop in a comfortable way. Just like all friendships, planted friendships still require work and selflessness and conflict resolution, but they begin with a seed you never had to plant.


It’s your sister. Your mom. Your cousin. It’s the little girl who moved in next door when you were two, and twenty years later you look up to realize she is closer than family. It’s your potluck roommate in college, who turned into your best friend.


It’s Megan, the daughter of my dad’s former co-worker. She grew up in New York and I’ve always lived in Texas, but over the years our families have become the best of friends. After twenty years of memories, letters, trips, and phone calls I get to stand beside her as she marries her husband this weekend!


It’s Abby, the wife of my husband’s best friend who also happens to be my coworker. Abby is godly, fun-loving, and incredibly thoughtful. We see each other everyday at work and often on the weekends. She has become my dear friend, my yoga buddy, and my confidant.


I didn’t do anything to deserve Megan or Abby—God simply planted them into my life. (For that, I am forever grateful!)


As an introvert, I am especially thankful for planted friendships because they blossom without forcing me to go outside of my comfort zone. They are safe and comfortable and natural.


It seems that as I grow older, there are less opportunities for planted friendships to form. In school, there were plenty of chances to meet new kids – a new class, a group project, cheer practice.


Now—in grown up life—making new friends takes work. It can be difficult, discouraging, and scary.


That’s where the hunting comes in.


Hunted friendships are the relationships you must go looking for—they most often begin when you step out of your comfort zone.


I’ve learned the best way to begin a new friendship is with brave vulnerability…


For the full blog and practical tips for friend hunting, check out! 

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