The Best Thing We’ve Ever Done for Our Marriage
One of the best things David and I have ever done for our marriage is plan a marriage retreat. No, don’t think of mega-church conference (although those are awesome too.) The kind of retreat we planned was just for the two of us.
It all started on a hike. To celebrate our first year of marriage, David and I went back to Sundance, Utah where in 2013, on a cold, snowy day in February our little Eseke family was established before God, surrounded by all our friends and family. As we hiked, we started asking each other questions about our first year of marriage: How I have I done loving you this year? What can I do to serve you better? How is our marriage glorifying God? We began dreaming about our future: What are our 5 year goals? What fun things can we do to build into our marriage and friendship this year?
The conversations those questions opened up were pure gold. They revealed growth opportunities and helped us figure out how to love one another better. Those questions helped us discover our mutual love for traveling and gave way to probably the best vacation of all time. After our hike, we began saving meticulously for a trip to Greece and a year later actually found ourselves zipping around Santorini on Vespas!
When we returned from that hike, we wrote down our list of questions and vowed to make it a habit to revisit them. Every year since, we have set aside a weekend to get away and spend time together reviewing the previous year, praying for our marriage, and planning for the future. Taking the time to thoughtfully respond to questions has blessed our marriage and strengthened our friendship in a way that only God could do! We record our answers to these questions in a journal, so that we can go back and read what we’ve written year’s prior. It’s already amusing to see how things have changed and so encouraging to remember how we have grown—and we are only three years into this thing! (I can wait to see what our journal looks like in year 20!)
Want to try your own marriage retreat?
Over the past year, several of our friends have used these same questions for their own marriage retreats and have encouraged us to share them with others. So, dear friends, we are excited to share them with you! These questions are not perfect, but they challenge us every year—in a good way. We pray God uses these questions to bless your marriage and draw you closer together.